Are you someone who has difficulty with peer relationships? 

Perhaps it’s challenging to either make or keep friends? 

Have you been the target of teasing or bullying?

Do you notice that it can be hard finding the right thing to say to others?  Or saying the right thing at the right time?

Maybe you know what you’d like to say, but have a tough time reading non-verbal physical cues like body language or tone of voice?

Do any of the above leave you feeling anxious and/or sad?

 

I’m Dr. Eric Spiegel, a licensed psychologist who specializes in relationship and group therapy.  If you answered yes to any of these questions, you may be a great fit for a new peer relationship therapy group that I’m starting for high school males at my Bryn Mawr office. 

This group offers support, process, and skill-building.  Allow me to explain what each means:

Support.  A support group naturally offers support – this will be a safe space where you can meet and connect with other teens like you.  It’s a great feeling to be able to share your experiences with others who understand where you’re coming from.  The group becomes a community of like-minded peers, where trust and confidence are developed simultaneously.

Process.  A process group is designed to help group members learn about how they affect others, and how others affect them.  I will help you gain a greater awareness of how you relate to the other group members; specifically, what kind of impact your verbal and non-verbal behaviors have on the other peers in the group.  It’s kind of like holding up a mirror to yourself in relationships.  It can be scary to “see” what’s in the mirror – that is, to get feedback from myself and the other group members – but there is no better way to learn, grow, and become more confident in your relationships than to experience yourself in an open and honest relationship group setting.

Skill-building.  Although this group will have an unstructured component to it in order to allow for group members to have the flexibility to share and respond to each other, there will also be a skill-building element, in which I will teach you skills to enhance your relationships.  We will review areas such as assertiveness training and empathy development.

This group will meet weekly for 90 minutes, on Mondays, from 7-8:30 PM at 14 S. Bryn Mawr Avenue, Suite 203, Bryn Mawr, PA 19010.  Group will start in September 2011, at the start of the new school year.

For more information, please contact me by phone at (215) 222-4825 or e-mail at espiegelphd@gmail.com. 

I just completed an interview with Jaleh Weber, for Yahoo! Associated Content on the use of hypnosis in the treatment of irritable bowel syndrome (IBS).  In the interview, we discussed what IBS is, its impact on patients,  and the role that hypnosis can play in a successful treatment plan for IBS.

In order to more directly serve my clientele on the Main Line, I've decided to open a second office location in Bryn Mawr.  Located in the heart of Bryn Mawr, with close proximity to Ardmore, Haverford, Villanova, Gladwyne, and Wayne, the new office location will allow me to conveniently work with Lower Merion and Radnor clients.

A licensed psychologist, I offer psychotherapy, couples/relational/marital counseling, hypnotherapy, and group therapy to adults and adolescents.  I am a generalist practitioner, with specialty areas in the treatment of anxiety and mood disorders, relationship concerns, pain management, and trauma.  My experience in clinical hypnosis allows me to work with a range of mind-body health issues, including habit control, insomnia, and irritable bowel syndrome, amongst others.  For a more exhaustive list of treatment areas, visit the "Who Do I Work With?" page on my website.

For the office address and contact information, please visit the Bryn Mawr office contact page.

This is the second brief blog post outlining some exciting changes to the practice website.  I've included a brief video welcome message on the front page of the website in order to better describe how I work as a psychologist.  For more detailed questions on how I might work with you, please contact me directly.

I've been working on some new and exciting changes to the practice website.  I'll be devoting two brief blog posts (this being part one) to discuss these revisions.  First, I've added a new section containing professional references attesting to my work.  This page includes comments about my work as a practitioner from two highly respected luminaries in the field of clinical hypnosis, Drs. Elgan Baker and Carolyn Daitch.  I'm immensely grateful for their kind words, and hope that by including them on my website, potential clients will have a better understanding of the type of services they can look forward to receiving from me.  Feel free to contact me with specific questions about how I might work with you.

If you haven't read it, I highly recommend the recent article in the New York Times on treating illness with hypnosis.  It's a very informative and accurate piece describing various clinical applications of hypnosis in treating illness and working with mind-body health.  In fact, the article nicely summarizes many of the applications of hypnosis in my practice, including anxiety, pain management, insomnia, and smoking cessation.  For more information on how I utilize hypnosis in my work, please visit the section in my website.  I've also created an informative page entitled "What is Hypnosis?" designed to answer basic questions about hypnosis.

I just returned from another stimulating Annual Meeting of the American Society of Clinical Hypnosis (ASCH).  I wanted to share some very interesting points from one of the keynote speakers, Dr. Michael Roizen, of the Cleveland Clinic.  Dr. Roizen is a well-known advocate for physical and mental health and wellness, and a co-founder with Dr. Mehmet Oz of the "Real Age" website, which features a number of strategies for improving health.

One of the points I found most fascinating was his assertion that while you don't control your genes, you do control whether you turn them 'on' or 'off'.  Dr. Roizen presented research which suggested that it is the turning 'on' of certain genes that leads over time to chronic disease, such as cancer.  Dietary choices, such as choosing to eat foods such as sugars and saturated fats, can turn on these genes.  Once they are in the 'on' position (e.g. prompting the body's production of enzymes, hormones), there is a certain period that must elapse before they will turn 'off' again.  Thus, when you eat fatty ice cream, you cannot "undo" that behavior by going to the gym to the next day.  Essentially, you would have to eat healthy for a few days/weeks/months (depending on the food), in order to reset the gene back to the 'off' position.

As a result, we see the importance of nutrition and dietary choices on physical health and wellness.  In addition to food choices, Dr. Roizen outlined three other factors which contribute to 75% of chronic disease: tobacco use, physical inactivity, and stress. 

As a psychologist with an interest in stress management, I am particularly interested in the last two factors.  Dr. Roizen suggests that as little as 30 minutes a day of vigorous of walking a day is all that is necessary to satisfy the physical activity requirement.  Furthermore, research has suggested that exercise can play an important adaptive role in mood and well-being. 

Although physical activity can be helpful in mitigating stress responses, there are also mental activities that are useful in lowering stress.  This is an area of particular relevance to my work.   Dr. Roizen suggests a daily meditation routine (15 minutes in the morning and 15 minutes in the evening) to help reduce stress.  Meditation and self-hypnosis are quite similar, in that they both emphasize a quiet, focused attention/awareness on the body (often the breath), as well as reflective observation and non-judgmental self-awareness and acceptance.  I incorporate principles of hypnosis and mindfulness meditation into my work.  I will oftentimes supply my clients with recordings to assist them in transitioning to a practice of self-hypnosis or meditation.  I believe that living a healthy life involves a proactive, consistent routine that allows us to practice wellness daily.  So many of us have a lifetime of practice at over-reacting; we can't expect this to change overnight without putting in the effort!  The good news is that we can make simple choices to lead healthier lives.

For more information on Dr. Roizen's work and research, please visit his "Real Age" website; for more information on my clinical services, which include hypnosis and mindfulness, please visit my website.

The term "Helicopter Parent" has gotten a lot of attention in the 21st century.  Wikipedia (2011) defines it as a parent "who pays extremely close attention to his or her child's or children's experiences and problems, particularly at educational institutions."  With a current private practice and past experience as a psychologist in a university counseling center, I have a lot of experience working on parenting issues with these types of families.  In my clinical experience, I find these parents to be individuals who are highly risk averse in their parenting style and believe that there own over-involvement is the safest way to guide their children through a potentially harsh environment.  As a clinician and parent, I have a great deal of empathy for these parents.  Life IS scary - there is so much that we don't have control over, and we live in a society that places a premium on control.  Furthermore, we live at a time where technology offers us a multitude of ways (cell phones, texting, instant messaging, e-mail, facebook) to maintain the illusion of control.  My empathy is high because most parents truly want the best for their child; they can just trip all over themselves trying to make it happen.

With a lot of "helicopter parents", there is an intuition, almost like a gut feeling, that a particular issue in a child's life (school, social life) has to be dealt with in a certain way.  It's almost like an itch that needs to be scratched.  Usually it stems from a belief that his or her child (oftentimes a teenager) doesn't know what he or she is doing and will make a mistake.  Oftentimes, there may be past behavior to support that belief.  Thus, the parent acts proactively (or sometimes reactively) to prevent the mistake.  By focusing on the underlying wish of your child, you can support his or her maturation and development (provided this is what you want - that is one of the complicated undertones of helicopter parenting - the fear of seeing your child grow up and not needing you in the same way he or she used to) while modeling healthy behavior.  For example, teens who agitate for use of the car, time out with their friends, a later curfew, etc. are often expressing a wish for freedom and independence.  I suggest empathizing with this wish, and helping provide some - but not too much - structure to help them express it constructively.  Talk with them and validate their wishes; then put out "carrots" to motivate for good behavior.  E.g. establishing a good track record with curfew offers the incentive for more time out with friends.

Two key words for helicopter parents are communication and moderation. 

With the former, go beneath the superficial talking points and discuss what's really driving the issues.  Share your hopes and fears.  Underneath the potential "rebel" stance, most teens value authenticity and can smell out hypocrisy from across the room.  However, be honest from the stance as a parent, not as a friend.  Figure out what your boundaries are and stick with them, but express them from an empathic position that respects your child's needs.

With the latter, remember the adage from the story of "The Three Bears.": not too hot, not too cold, just right.  Look for balance in your parenting, and overall level of involvement.  Space is good - not too little, not too much. 

Remember, the issue of "separation and individuation" in parenting begins when children are quite young.  For example, when our little child is playing in front of us and falls, our urge is to run to them and see if they are OK.  But what if you could hold back for just a second or two?  Maybe your child might surprise you and not even be bothered by the fall or even laugh about it.  If he or she is hurt, you are still right there to come to his or her aid (and the cry will let you know).  The best way to grow is to learn how to fall and get back up.  If we never let our children experience the pain of falling, we deny them the opportunities that come with getting back up.  It is amazing how this metaphor continues to play out, right through college and beyond.

Please keep in mind that this blog is a starting point - not an ending one.  These issues are usually complex, and it can often be helpful to speak with other parents or a mental health professional.  For more information on my psychotherapy services , please visit my website.

We're in the midst of another ferocious winter in the Philadelphia region.  The city and suburbs just logged 14 inches of snow in 5 hours!  And two weeks ago, the temperature dropped to near zero in many of the outlying PA suburbs, such as Bucks, Chester, Delaware and Montgomery counties.  In these kinds of conditions, many people feel "trapped" indoors.

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), first described by Dr. Norman Rosenthal, is a condition in which mood becomes more depressed during the diminished light of the winter months.  Regardless of whether one is diagnosed with SAD or just has more general depressed mood, here are a few basic strategies I recommend to beat the blues.  These should not take the place of therapy or medication if they are needed (if you're unsure, consult with a doctor or mental health professional), but can be a starting point.

1) Get exercise and stay active.  The temptation in the cold is to go straight home and be a couch potato in the warmth.  While this can be relaxing at times, don't make this the norm.  Some studies have found a relationship between exercise and improved mood.  The tentative thinking is that exercise may play a role in neurotransmitter production or transmission, which can be associated with mood disorders.  You don't have to join a gym to stay fit - going for a 20-30 minute vigorous walk can go a long way... so bundle up!

2) Engage in basic mindfulness, meditation, or self-hypnosis.  I won't get into the specifics in this post, but there are a lot of classes and therapies out there that emphasize this approach.  Having a built-in time during the day for breathing, self-reflection, guided imagery and/or mindful awareness without judgment is a great stress reliever!  Even if it is a short 15-20 minute stretch each day, it can go a long way.  I offer therapy which features this approach and teaches clients how to use it on their own.

3) Build up your social support system... and use it!  Not everyone likes talking about their problems, but having a few trusted friends or family members can be an important outlet.  If you can, vary your relationships.  Have some friends with whom you can be active and enjoy the comaraderie of doing something together; have others who are good confidants with whom you can talk about emotional issues.

Remember - it can always be helpful to talk with a professional if you feel unusually sad or depressed.  There is nothing wrong with seeking personal therapy - in fact it can be a sign of growth!  Various mental health therapies can be helpful for depression.  In addition, light therapy, anti-depressant medication or other techniques have been used for Seasonal Affective Disorder in particular.  Consult with a mental health professional if you believe you have SAD or clinical depression.

For more information on SAD, I recommend reading some of the books written by Dr. Rosenthal on the subject; they can be found with a quick online search or a visit to your local bookstore.

The recent national tragedy in Tucson has highlighted individual differences in coping with a tragedy.  Oftentimes, media attention is drawn to negative aspects of coping with trauma, such as Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).  It is true that being a survivor of a traumatic event - or even potentially vicariously witnessing it through media coverage - can be associated with unpleasant symptoms such as flashbacks, numbness, and emotional flooding. 

Yet experiencing a traumatic event - however scary and disorienting it can be - can also serve as an opportunity to grow in unexpected and positive ways.  There are different terms for this phenomenon, such as 'resilience' and 'post-traumatic growth', but essentially it involves existential and structural change.  What do I mean by this?  I am referring to being shaken to your core after a stressful event and having to face challenging questions about your life and its meaning.  Questions such as: Who am I?  What is my purpose?  Why did I live (while others died)?  I use the terms "existential" and "structural" because trauma survivors must answer these basic questions of existence; and oftentimes these survivors are not the same person they were before the event.  Although the latter often involves loss of some aspect of self-identity, going through a period of struggling can also allow a person to discover strengths he or she didn't realize they had.

If you have more interest in learning about these subjects, I would recommend an online brochure on resilience offered by the American Psychological Association. 

I also wrote my dissertation on positive buffers of terrorism-related anxiety , including resilience, social support, and spirituality.  This is a good resource for a more detailed empirical focus on this subject.